Pregnancy Woes--Probably a Little TMI

I had such high hopes for this pregnancy. I started out feeling so good. Tired, of course, but good. My morning sickness was nowhere near as bad as it was with my previous 3 children, and it ended a good 3 weeks sooner than it did with previous pregnancies.

Early contractions have been a problem in the past. And the bad thing is that they start 4 weeks earlier with each baby (Makayla-32 wks, Ellie-28 wks, Kimberly 24 wks). When we decided to move, I knew I would have to be extra careful. And I was (unless you ask my mom who thinks I did WAY too much), but the contractions came anyway. At 18 weeks. After seeing my doctor and being told not to lift more than 20 pounds, with the exception of Kimberly who weighs 23 pounds, I was a lot better. I have been better. And honestly, after we got moved in I was feeling so much better.

But then a few days ago, all that changed. I started getting some pretty bad cramps. Not so much contractions as "if I was on my period I would be downing a Pepsi and some Midol while snuggling up with a heating pad" kind of cramps. And they come from doing the simplest things--walking up the stairs, being on my feet for 30 minutes, squatting down to put shoes on somebody. Little things that you wouldn't think anything of. And if little things cause this kind of cramping, imagine what it does for me to lift Kimberly into her car seat, go grocery shopping (even with a friend who is pushing the cart and unloading the food at my house), insert any number of things here.

And then there are the headaches. Does anyone else get headaches when pregnant? I've heard it happens but never experienced it. My headaches get so bad that I literally cannot see. I open my eyes and all I see are black spots. I am completely useless to do anything but lay in the dark with a cold rag on my face. Medication does not help. I am simply at the mercy of the pain until it goes away on its own. Sometimes hours later. And one time, 2 days later.

I do not want to have a preemie baby. I want her to be full term and plump and healthy. But at the same time, I am soooo ready not to be pregnant anymore. Because I know it only gets harder from here.

Ugh! I am so bad at being pregnant!