Kindergarten starts next week for Makayla, and our house is overflowing with anxiety and excitement.
Makayla is excited to the point of jumping up and down and clapping every time she looks out the window at her new school. (Yes we can see it from our front door. How convenient!) And I'm so nervous that every time I think about next Wednesday, tears well up in my eyes.
I will openly and honestly admit that I am totally overprotective of my children. I am that mother at the playground who hovers over her children to make sure they don't fall down and scrape a knee. I am the mother who instantly whips out the band aids at the sight of a hangnail; although I am getting better about not wasting band aids on non-blood injuries. I am the mother who would tie her children to her when out in public if I didn't think it would land me an interview with Child Protective Services. I'm just so paranoid about harm coming to my children that I overdo it a lot, I think. The thought of letting them get hurt, physically or emotionally, so they can learn and grow is agonizing to me.
When we were on vacation in July, we stopped at a park to let the girls run around and get out some energy. Makayla was playing with a little boy, having the time of her life. One of his friends came over and the two boys started saying mean things to her. She broke down in tears and buried her head in my stomach. I literally had to take Makayla and leave the park to keep myself from picking up a stick and beating the crap out of those little boys. I just can't handle the thought of someone being mean to my child.
See? Overprotective.
I'm so nervous because I know things like that will happen to her on the playground at school. But this time, I won't be there to save her. And I know some of you will say that it will be good for her to have those experiences to teach her about life blah, blah, blah. It doesn't matter. She's my baby. When she hurts, I hurt. It's that simple.
Another thing that keeps me awake at night is the fact that Makayla is my runner. She has run away from home, from church, from preschool, from birthday parties. I am terrified about her being overwhelmed by kindergarten and running away. Because that's what she does. She's been that way ever since she could walk. When a situation gets too intense for her or when she has simply had enough, she runs away. Yikes! I can't even think about this anymore. I can feel my ulcer wreaking havoc on my stomach!
I was discussing these things with a friend today. I told her my plan to walk Makayla to her classroom every day for the first little while until I knew for sure that she knew her way. Having a child who attended this school last year, she informed me that parents walking kids to their classrooms is highly discouraged. The teachers and administrators prefer that parents drop off their kids at the front door and allow the teachers and teachers' aides to guide the children to their classrooms. Fantastic! I definitely needed something else to worry about--whether or not someone took notice of my child among hundreds and guided her where she needs to be.
I know that I'm paranoid. And I know that I'm way too overprotective. I'm just not sure how to let things go. Any suggestions?
9 comments:
Highly discouraged parent walking children to class. UGHHHH!!!! Why should they care!!! You do what you want to do. I'd probably be walking my children to their classes too. HIGHLY paranoid as well. You can never be too safe right??? I don't know. I'd be worrying too. I know how it feels like to be overprotective!
'Highly discouraged' does not make it prohibited. If they tell you no, explain to them her tendency to run. She is your child, you have the right to walk her to class. BTW! You are a very good mother! You may be paranoid :), but what GOOD mother is not paranoid where her children are concerned?
The point is not to leave your child standing at the door waiting for someone to pick her up. The point is to "transfer" the kid at the door from your hands to the teacher's hands. You know exactly who your child is with and know that she is not just roaming the halls looking for where she needs to be. Most schools during the first week also make temporary changes to their normal schedules to give the new families time to adjust. The goal they are trying to achieve by this is to teach the kids that the school is not a scary place. Walking your child all the way into the classroom and hanging around while they show you everything in every corner and then trying to leave usually ends in a screaming-crying fit of anxiety for the child. My thoughts are that they are trying to prevent this action. Makayla probably won't be that way BUT, there are those kids that are. Just imagine, a classroom of screaming, crying children all trying to run through the door to go get their parents after they walk out of the classroom? Now that's chaos.
so I know being paranoid you have already talked to her teacher about her running tendancy so the teacher will be aware of that, and the fact that she can see your house from the school might help with the overwhelming thing she can look at the house and calm down or if she does try to run it is close to home so not too bad. I am a paranoid mom a very differant way I am always afraid someone is going to take my kids, I let them play and if they are doing something thats a little dangerous I warn them once and if they still do it I let them learn from falling and getting hurt. It works better with my monsters. Good luck it will get better my mom hid behind tree and had people watching Daniel while he walked to school by himself when he was in Kindergarden so you aren't the only paranoid one out there!
Things are a little different in our school district. For kindergarteners, the first week is all about learning the rules and schedule and where things are in the school. The kids only go 2 days during the week and each will have class time with all the kindergarten teachers.
She won't know who her real teacher is until the second week of school. That's frustrating because I dont' know who her teacher is to tell her all these things about Makayla.
I think all the first week unknowns are adding to my anxiety.
Good luck Laura. Wow, I never thought about all these things, but my kid still has a couple years before he goes. All I have to say is do whatever you feel most comfortable with, she's your child! Good luck and let us know how it goes. I'm sure it will probably be much easier than what you see in your head.
I ALWAYS walked Spencer to his class when we went there. they never said anything to me! I'm sure the first couple of weeks are going to be HARD.
i could just seeing you staring out the window at the school! try to keep yourself busy!!
she WILL be fine!
I don't think you are too paranoid or too protective. I know my hubby gets mad at me at times cause I am constantly hovering around my kids at playgrounds, outside, blah blah. I am scared to pieces to take Brenden to Pre-School next week. I have never left him with any body but family. I totally get where you are coming from---soo good luck and try to relax a bit so you can rest:)
I feel your pain- I am an OVER PROTECTIVE Mother as well. Luckily with Mason we met with his teacher 2 times before KDG started. We have to drop them off outside, but all the kdg teachers doors are there and when the bell rings the kids line up in front of their door. And us "over protective" parent wait until our little ones are inside their class room. It is hard the 1st couple days... but, I think this next week for us will be better. It helps a lot when your kdger is excited about going & just as excited when you pick them up! I wish you the best.. its hard... but its the way life is!
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